Communion Of Dreams

Another turn of the wheel.
November 4, 2010, 11:38 am
Filed under: Alzheimer's, Bipolar, Health, Predictions, Publishing, Science Fiction

Consider this something of a companion piece to yesterday’s entry.

For some time now I have been increasingly aware of a shift, a change in the wind. From this:

But the good news is that once I realize how deeply I am into this cycle, it usually means that I don’t have a whole lot further down to go. Typically, just a matter of weeks.

Of course, hitting bottom was followed by a prolonged illness this time – a month’s worth of serious pneumonia, and then two months of uneven recovery (which I am still struggling with, though the trend is up.) Even for me, this is unusual.

But it perhaps signifies something else: a larger pattern at work.

I have been intensely ill at several junctures of my life – oh, nothing life-threatening, just really, *really* sick. And those instances tend to come at the culmination of a closing chapter in my life, following a long period of intense work. Usually, once I start to emerge back towards health, it marks a sea change. Like now.

The long years of being a care provider, followed by intensely working on the care giving book, are over. What was by necessity a period of intense introspection and even hermitage has played itself out. The stage is set for me to move on, to turn my energy and my attention outwards again.

What do I mean?

I’m not entirely sure yet. Certainly, with Communion of Dreams to be published, there will be the need for publicity. If we can also get Her Final Year into print, that will compound things, demand more of me.

And here’s the thing – this doesn’t bother me. Oh, I am still an introvert by nature, but I now feel ready to once again take on the role of a public figure.

It’s a bit like re-inventing myself. Not changing my nature, but choosing to emphasize another aspect of myself. And there is power in that.

Jim Downey


2 Comments so far
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I was reading about Titan on Wikipedia, which led me to the “Titan in Fiction” page, which then led me to your book and ultimately this page. I just ordered it on Amazon.

I’m also Bipolar, which honestly sold the book to me. It’s amazing how people with this gift/curse are often driven to the creative arts. I’m in college right now to be a screenwriter. I’ve come to believe that having been in the darkest and brightest of the emotional spectrum, my understanding of life, human nature, and the universe has been broadened and complexified. This fuels my writing when I’m manic and when I’m depressed. Interestingly I’m the least creative and least interested in writing when I’m somewhere in between the two. I suspect you’ve had similar experiences.

It’s very inspiring to me seeing that you’re finding success in the creative world. I can’t wait for the book to arrive and start reading!

Comment by Tyler Cohen

Tyler, I concur – it is a natural thing for those of us who are bipolar to find outlet in the arts. And I agree with your assessment of being able to better understand the highs & lows of human experience.

Do take care, and if your bipolar swings become excessive – if you find yourself doing dangerous or harmful things – please do get help. It can be a very difficult disease to live with. Mine is mild, but even so there have been times when I was more out of control than I was comfortable with after the fact.

I hope you enjoy the book when you have a chance to read it. Cheers.


Comment by James Downey

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