Filed under: Connections, Daily Kos, Feedback, General Musings, Promotion, Publishing, Society, Writing stuff
Just thought I’d take a moment and do a little meta stuff this morning.
First off, over 6,250 have now downloaded the novel. The pace has slowed somewhat in the last couple of months, with just 5 or 10 people a day downloading it. Still, I find that encouraging, given how little effort I have put into trying to promote the book. If you know someone who enjoys SF, send ’em a link to it – a cheap and quick Christmas gift, if you want to just send them the .pdf of the the book. I figure eventually this will help me get the book published, so the more downloads, the better.
A little more surprising to me is how popular this blog has become. Typically, I get between 50 and 70 hits a day now, and the total is over 10,500 views, and that doesn’t include people who get an RSS feed. (If you do read this by RSS, either drop me a note or leave a comment, would you? I would like to have some sense of how many people do, and the WordPress software doesn’t let you know that.) I don’t get a lot of comments, which surprises me a bit, given how my posts (and cross-postings) elsewhere tend to generate discussion. But that’s OK, as there has been a slow but steady rise in readership and linkage from other sites. Sure, it’s nothing like UTI or Daily Kos, but still, I’m pleased that my random wonderings do regularly draw readers.
And yes, I do a lot of random wondering about things. Just a glance to the left will show you that – there are 239 categories. And this will make post number 241. For a blog which started out with the ostensible goal of discussing my novel, it has turned into something else almost entirely. But that’s OK – as I told a friend via email this morning, this allows me to keep my intellectual and writing skills somewhat sharpened during this time when my attention span is compromised by the demands of care-giving. If you figure my average post runs something like 500 words, I’ve written another full-length novel here – but given my current lack of ability to really concentrate and plan, a novel would be out of the question presently. This helps keep those other writing skills fresh, and that’s about the best I can hope for.
So, thanks for coming by. And Merry Christmas to you and yours.
Jim Downey
Filed under: Alzheimer's, General Musings, Health, Hospice, Religion, Sleep, Society
I walked into the dark room, stepped up to the bed. My MIL looked up at me, and said “I don’t like these rails and straps.”
There are the standard ‘hospital rails’ on the side of her bed. And since she’s several times attempted to climb over them (and broken bones in the subsequent fall), we put some nylon straps across from one rail to the other in a sort-of cargo net arrangement. It allows her to move freely in bed, but stops her from trying to climb out on her own. “Well, I’m sorry, but they need to stay on.”
She smiled. “Doesn’t matter – I’ve decided that I’m going to leave today, go back home to Missouri.”
We live in Missouri. But I didn’t want to contradict her, not that early in the morning when there would be little point to it. If she went back to sleep, she’d likely forget the conversation completely, anyway. “That’s fine. But for now try and go back to sleep – you don’t get up until 8:00.”
“OK.”
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
While I am not religious (hardly), I nonetheless enjoy some aspects of the holiday season. Working in small-market radio for four years between college and grad school forever traumatized me in regards to Christmas songs of every stripe, but I enjoy gift-giving, feasting, some good Christmas cheer with family and friends. Yesterday afternoon during our ‘respite’ break, my wife and I went out and selected a tree from the family farm – cedar, the traditional family tree – and brought it home. Now that it is settling, we’ll get it decorated some time this weekend.
That’s late for us, and we got a smaller tree than usual. Simple reason for this: it’s less work. And right now, just about anything that’s less work is the default position.
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
Our regular hospice nurse was on vacation this week, so the agency made arrangements for another nurse to come by and check on my MIL. She arrived on time, bringing supplies and meds, and went in to chat with my MIL.
“I read that nice article about you!” she told my MIL.
“Article?” asked my MIL.
Out of sight of my MIL, I shook my head at the nurse, mouthed the words “She doesn’t remember it.”
She nodded.
I spoke to my MIL “She’s just talking about a nice article that was in the paper, about people who care for their loved ones at home when they get older.”
“Oh, did you write it?”
It surprises me sometimes the things that she remembers. I used to write a column for the paper. “No, I didn’t write it.”
“But you used to write such nice things.”
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
I’ve never obsessed about getting presents to people “on time” – most of my friends and family have busy lives themselves, and understand how things stand here with us. But this year we’ve really been caught short on planning, and our shopping has been sporadic, at best. I’ve been able to take care of a lot of routine things, and gotten a couple of special gifts. But for the most part I just haven’t had the energy and focus to try and find the right gifts for others. And the shopping we usually do for my MIL just hasn’t gotten done at all this year. That’ll be a disappointment to some.
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
I walked out with the hospice nurse when she was done checking over my MIL. Either my wife or I usually do this, so we can go over info we didn’t necessarily want to discuss in front of my MIL, the other staying and helping get my MIL dressed or back into bed.
“Anything to add?” she asked.
“No, not really. We’re just unsure of where we are. Not knowing is difficult.”
“Well, I can’t say for sure. But the end could come fairly quickly. You’ll just have to let us know if you see a sudden downturn, so we can be here every day rather than just weekly.”
I nodded.
“You know, you guys are doing just an incredible job in caring for her. I wish that half of our patients got even half as good care as your MIL is getting.”
“Thanks.”
And as I turned to go up the stairs, back into the house, eyes watering, she repeated: “You guys are doing an incredible job.”
Then why do I feel guilty? Like I should be doing more?
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
“I hope I’ve made the right decision.”
“What decision is that?” asked my wife, as she helped her mom sit up on the side of the bed.
“Well, I think it’s time I went home. I’ve enjoyed my stay, but I think that I should be getting back.”
“That’s fine,” said my wife, putting slippers on my MIL’s feet. “But how about some breakfast, first?”
“That sounds nice, dear.”
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
Jim Downey
(Cross-posted to dKos.)
Filed under: Arthur C. Clarke, General Musings, Predictions, Science Fiction, Society, Star Trek, Star Wars, Writing stuff
A good friend sent me a link to a Sunday Times commentary by Bryan Appleyard titled “Why don’t we love science fiction?”. Here’s the opening paragraph:
In the 1970s, Kingsley Amis, Arthur C Clarke and Brian Aldiss were judging a contest for the best science-fiction novel of the year. They were going to give the prize to Grimus, Salman Rushdie’s first novel. At the last minute, however, the publishers withdrew the book from the award. They didn’t want Grimus on the SF shelves. “Had it won,” Aldiss, the wry, 82-year-old godfather of British SF, observes, “he would have been labelled a science-fiction writer, and nobody would have heard of him again.”
Painfully true. Of course, had this happened, Rushdie may have been able to avoid that whole fatwa business which had him in hiding for a while. Sadly, SF writers aren’t taken seriously enough to even warrant killing for their sacrilege.
Then why read science fiction, let alone write the stuff? Appleyard has a good handle on this:
“The truth is,” Aldiss has written, “that we are at last living in an SF scenario.” A collapsing environment, a hyperconnected world, suicide bombers, perpetual surveillance, the discovery of other solar systems, novel pathogens, tourists in space, children drugged with behaviour controllers – it’s all coming true at last. Aldiss thinks this makes SF redundant. I disagree. In such a climate, it is the conventionally literary that is threatened, and SF comes into its own as the most hardcore realism.
He explores more of this in his column, which I heartily recommend reading. Not that this will change things for most people, of course – there is a deep-seated prejudice against SF, even within significant portions of the SF community. Why? Well, as Appleyard says, good SF – the stuff that lasts and has an impact – is about examining our own dark nature and fears about where our science will lead us. And that is just a little too stark for many people, who want escapism more than they want to confront the prospect of what we are doing to ourselves and our environment. I think that this is why such fantastic yet formulaic SF as Star Wars or even Star Trek tends to be much more popular than the more nitty-gritty stuff.
Now, I enjoy a good, upbeat ending as much as the next person. Communion of Dreams has such an ending, though there is pain and loss. But look at where Communion starts – in a world made worse by our foolish actions and fears, a grim view of both our future and ourselves. Getting past that is difficult for many people.
Well, I do love science fiction – for all the reasons Appleyard has cited, and all that I have written about on this blog. I guess for me it comes down to being willing to take a long, cold look at reality – because only when you really understand exactly what problems you have can you make an effective change. SF allows us to do that, if it is well written and honest. But I long ago learned that most people prefer a pretty lie to honest truth.
Jim Downey
Filed under: Alzheimer's, Book Conservation, General Musings, Guns, Health, Hospice, NPR, Predictions, Publishing, Science Fiction, Sleep, Society, tech, Writing stuff
As I’ve mentioned previously, I try and catch NPR’s Weekend Edition Saturday regularly. This morning’s show was hosted by John Ydstie, and had a very nice three minute meditation titled Reflecting on a Past Generation which dealt with the differences between his life and his father-in-law’s, as measured in physical weight and strength. You should listen to it, but the main thrust of the piece is how Ydstie’s FIL was a man of the mechanical age, used to dealing with tools and metal and machines, whereas Ydstie is used to working with computers and electronic equipment which is becoming increasingly light weight, almost immaterial.
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
Last weekend, as part of my preparations for tackling in earnest the big conservation job for the seminary, I got a large fireproof safe. I needed something much larger than my little cabinet to safely secure the many books I will have here at any given time. And about the most cost-effective solution to this need was a commercial gun safe, the sort of thing you see in sporting goods stores and gun shops all around the country.
So, since a local retailer was having a big Holiday sale, I went and bought a safe. It’s 60 inches tall, 30 inches wide, and 24 inches deep. And it weighs 600 pounds.
And the retailer doesn’t offer any kind of delivery and set-up.
“Liability issues,” explained the salesman when I asked. “But the guys out at the loading dock will help get it loaded into your truck or trailer.”
Gee, thanks.
So I went and rented a low-to the ground trailer sufficiently strong for hauling a 600 pound safe (I have a little trailer which wouldn’t be suitable). And an appliance dolly. And went and got the safe.
When I showed up at the loading dock and said I needed to pick up a safe, people scattered. The poor bastard I handed the paperwork to sighed, then disappeared into the warehouse. He returned a few minutes later with some help and my safe, mounted on its own little wooden pallet and boxed up. The four guys who loaded it into my trailer used a little cargo-loader, and were still grunting and cursing. I mostly stayed out of their way and let them do the job the way they wanted. Liability issues, you know.
I drove the couple miles home, and parked. And with a little (but critical) help from my good lady wife, it took just a half an hour and a bit of effort to get the safe in the house and settled where I wanted it. Yes, it was difficult, and I wouldn’t really want to tackle moving anything larger essentially on my own. But using some intelligence, an understanding of balance, and the right tool for the job I was able to move the 600 pound mass of metal with relative ease. And it made me feel damned good about my flabby own self.
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
In contrast, the most difficult things I have ever done don’t really have a ‘weight’ to them. Communion of Dreams took me years of hard work to write and rewrite (multiple times), and yet is nothing more than phantasm, able to fly through the internet and be read by thousands. There are no physical copies to be bought, shared with a friend, lugged around and cherished or dropped disgustedly into a recycle bin. It is just electrons, little packets of yes and no.
And these past years of being a care provider, how do I weigh them (other than the additional fat I carry around from lack of proper exercise and too little sleep)? I suppose that I could count up all the times I have had to pick up my MIL, transfer her between chair and toilet, or lay her down gently on her bed. But even in this, things tend towards the immaterial, as she slowly loses weight along with her memories of this life. And soon, she will be no more than a body to be removed, carried one last time by others sent by the funeral home.
How do you weigh a life?
Jim Downey
Filed under: BoingBoing, Constitution, Flu, General Musings, Government, Predictions, Press, Science Fiction, Society, Violence, Writing stuff, YouTube
OK, I realize that I am probably the last person on the planet to hear of this, but nonetheless I want to rant about it. What it? The YouTube vid of the Utah HP Officer using his Taser on a guy pulled over for speeding which has been getting a fair amount of press and blog attention. Before I say any more, here’s the clip:
OK, first thing – my dad was a cop, and I’ve known cops all my life. I generally like cops, and respect the job they do – it’s dangerous, grim, and I don’t want to have anything to do with it.
Next thing – it’s stupid to do anything other than smile nice and comply with what a cop tells you. Yeah, stupid. Because in that situation, out in the real world, the cop (or his buddy cops) is gonna win any argument. You got a problem, save it for your trial or a lawsuit against the cop/department/government.
Last thing – because we give cops this much power over us, we *have* to insure that they exercise their authority properly and appropriately. That’s the trade-off, the contract we make with the government.
And this HP Officer did not properly exercise his authority. I think any fair viewing of the video leaked out to YouTube pretty clearly indicates just exactly what happened: for whatever reason, this cop did not like having his power challenged, and escalated the situation in a completely inappropriate manner, endangering the man he’d pulled over, the man’s family, himself, and just about anyone else who was traveling that stretch of highway at that time. It was in violation of the HP guidelines:
Troopers that carry Tasers must take a four-hour certification course outlining how and when to use the devices, according to UHP’s nine-page policy. They are taught to use them in three circumstances:
* When a person is a threat to themselves, an officer or another person.
* In cases where the physical use of force would endanger the person or someone else.
* When other means of lesser or equal force by the officer has been ineffective and a threat still exists.
Now, will the internal review of the use of the Taser in this instance show that the cop behaved in compliance with the rules? Will the cop be disciplined? Will the victim see justice in court? I don’t know, I suppose we’ll have to see. And we’ll have to see whether the social contract we make with the government in this case is honored, or whether it is yet again broken by a system in which the government and its officials are seen to be our rulers rather than our employees.
What does all of this have to do with Communion of Dreams? Not a lot, directly. But a whole lot, indirectly. Because I see this abuse kind of power by the government today as part of the reason why, when in the ‘history’ of the novel things break down following the first fire-flu, there’s a lot of civil unrest leading to something akin to a second civil war. Because if people do not trust their government or its officers, then when there is a catastrophe they will not trust it to act on their behalf, and will seek to protect and defend themselves even from their own government. It is a throw-away line early in the book, but the post-flu US I see is largely libertarian in nature for this very reason.
Jim Downey
(A slightly different version of this rant has been cross-posted to UTI.)
Filed under: 2nd Amendment, ACLU, Bruce Schneier, Constitution, General Musings, Government, Guns, Politics, Society, Terrorism
I notice that I’ve been writing a fair amount on civil liberties and the encroachment on them by the government thanks to the “War on Terror”. I’m not really that obsessed with this stuff, but I just keep stumbling across things which should make anyone concerned.
The latest is an item I saw on Yahoo! this morning, from the AP:
AP: Firefighters help in war on terror
WASHINGTON – Firefighters in major cities are being trained to take on a new role as lookouts for terrorism, raising concerns of eroding their standing as American icons and infringing on people’s privacy.
Unlike police, firefighters and emergency medical personnel don’t need warrants to access hundreds of thousands of homes and buildings each year, putting them in a position to spot behavior that could indicate terrorist activity or planning.
You know, at first glance this doesn’t seem that unreasonable, and I’m sure that is what the government is counting on as the word of it spreads to the public. Sure, if some firemen happen to stumble across a big pile of bombs in the basement of someone’s apartment, it would be reasonable for them to report it. What’s the big deal?
Well, think a little more about it, and see what else is in the news report:
When going to private residences, for example, they are told to be alert for a person who is hostile, uncooperative or expressing hate or discontent with the United States; unusual chemicals or other materials that seem out of place; ammunition, firearms or weapons boxes; surveillance equipment; still and video cameras; night-vision goggles; maps, photos, blueprints; police manuals, training manuals, flight manuals; and little or no furniture other than a bed or mattress.
Be alert for someone who is hostile? Uncooperative? Expressing hate or discontent?
That is dangerously close to thought-policing. If the simple act of expressing discontent (or being perceived as doing so) with the government or any of its agents is enough to get you reported to Homeland Security (which is what the firefighters are being trained to do), then we have slipped past simple awareness to making judgement calls as to what is appropriate political behaviour.
And think about how this might be received: do you seriously want any community or individuals who *might* be at-odds with the political leadership of the state, local, or federal government to be reluctant to report a fire, for fear that some literature they have sitting on a desk could be perceived as necessitating a call to Homeland Security? Isn’t that a good way for a fire to get hold, perhaps destroying whole apartment blocks or close-together urban neighborhoods?
Or put another way, would you want your neighbor, who maybe does a little pot on the weekends, to be afraid to call 9-11 for you when you’re having a heart attack, because he fears that the EMS team might notice that he’s a little red-eyed when they show up? Or have your roommate, who likes to go target shooting and is set up to do his own reloading, not want to call when you think you’ve accidentally swallowed some poison, since the EMS team might see his guns and gunpowder?
This undermines our trust in the neutral agency of our emergency-response personnel, and so makes us all less safe in the long run. The government has the authority to serve us when in need, not spy on us when it wants. If they want to conduct police actions, they should have to meet the necessary legal requirements to do so, and not try to pull some end-around trick like this.
*Sigh* A reminder that I need to renew my ACLU membership.
Jim Downey
(Cross posted to UTI.)
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Added: Bruce Schneier reminded me of this post of his touching on the same topic earlier this month. Definitely read it.
JD.
Filed under: Artificial Intelligence, Expert systems, General Musings, Government, Predictions, Science Fiction, Society, tech, Writing stuff
I’m always surprised when people *don’t* know the limitations and liabilities of the technology they take for granted. Take for example this Washington Post story about cellphone tracking:
Cellphone Tracking Powers on Request
Secret Warrants Granted Without Probable CauseFederal officials are routinely asking courts to order cellphone companies to furnish real-time tracking data so they can pinpoint the whereabouts of drug traffickers, fugitives and other criminal suspects, according to judges and industry lawyers.
In some cases, judges have granted the requests without requiring the government to demonstrate that there is probable cause to believe that a crime is taking place or that the inquiry will yield evidence of a crime. Privacy advocates fear such a practice may expose average Americans to a new level of government scrutiny of their daily lives.
Gee, ya think?
See, here’s the thing: cell phones have to maintain steady contact with cell towers in their area, in order for you to have reliable service. Also, the Enhanced 911 system needs to be able to figure out where you are if you call, so the technology is built-in. And many phones simply have a GPS system. Your mobile phone service provider can basically track your movements at all times, so long as you have your phone with you. There have even been cases where people have been disciplined/dismissed from jobs based on cell movement monitoring by their employer. And Google “cell phone monitoring” (or any variant) and not only will you get a lot of hits, but off to the right are a bunch of sponsored links from companies offering to help you monitor the movement of someone based on their cell phone. Charming, eh? Do you seriously think that the government wouldn’t take advantage of this?
Oh, and one more item to keep in mind: remember, your phone doesn’t even have to be ‘on’ for this to work. So long as the battery is plugged in, it is ‘live’. And if they want to, your cell phone company (at the behest of the authorities?) can turn on the mic to listen in on your conversations even when you aren’t using the phone.
Yeah, you’re carrying a tracking device in your pocket. And a ‘bug’. Welcome to the future.
Actually, this sort of thing is where I see the tech of the personal expert system AI like Seth developing for Communion of Dreams. Such an entity could function as a screen for you – keeping track of your movements at all times, providing the necessary safety & convenience, but being a ‘black box’ to any outside agency. Almost like how a good butler or house-elf would serve someone but jealously guard their privacy/secrets. And in the ongoing battle between prying eyes and effective counter-measures, such systems would be pushed to develop greater capabilities and eventually intelligence.
Jim Downey
(Slightly different version of this cross-posted to UTI.)
Filed under: BoingBoing, Constitution, Cory Doctorow, General Musings, Government, NYT, Politics, Predictions, Press, Society, Terrorism
Over the weekend, news came out of yet another “Trust us, we’re the government” debacle, this time in the form of the principal deputy director of national intelligence saying that Americans have to give up on the idea that they have any expectation of privacy. Rather, he said, we should simply trust the government to properly safeguard the communications and financial information that they gather about us. No, I am not making this up. From the NYT:
“Our job now is to engage in a productive debate, which focuses on privacy as a component of appropriate levels of security and public safety,” Donald Kerr, the principal deputy director of national intelligence, told attendees of the Geospatial Intelligence Foundation’s symposium in Dallas.
* * *
“Too often, privacy has been equated with anonymity,” he said, according to a transcript [pdf]. “But in our interconnected and wireless world, anonymity – or the appearance of anonymity – is quickly becoming a thing of the past.”
The future, Mr. Kerr says, is seen in MySpace and other online troves of volunteered information, and also in the the millions of commercial transactions made on the web or on the phone every day. If online merchants can be trusted, he asks, then why not federal employees, who face five years in jail and a $100,000 fine for misusing data from surveillance?
Or, from the Washington Post:
“Our job now is to engage in a productive debate, which focuses on privacy as a component of appropriate levels of security and public safety,” Kerr said. “I think all of us have to really take stock of what we already are willing to give up, in terms of anonymity, but (also) what safeguards we want in place to be sure that giving that doesn’t empty our bank account or do something equally bad elsewhere.”
This mindset, that allowing the government to just vacuum up all of our personal information, to monitor our email and phone communications, or whatever else they are doing but don’t want to tell is, is somehow equivalent to my posting information on this blog or giving some company my credit card number when I want to buy something, is fucking absurd. First off, there is a fundamental difference between what I willingly reveal to someone in either a personal or commercial exchange, and having my information taken without my knowledge or agreement. To say otherwise is to say that just because my phone number is listed in the phone directory, everyone who has the ability to do so is free to listen in on my phone conversations.
Even worse, it shows how we are viewed by this individual, and our government: as their subjects, without rights or expectations of being in control of our lives.
And the notion that we can just trust governmental employees with our private information is patently ridiculous. First off, saying that we should because we already trust commercial businesses with our private information is completely specious – how many times in the last year have you heard of this or that company’s database having been hacked and credit card, personal, and financial information having been stolen? This alone is a good reason to not allow further concentration of our private data to be gathered in one place. Secondly, think of the many instances when hard drives with delicate information have been lost by government employees in the State Department, at the Department of Veterans Affairs, or even at Los Alamos National Laboratory – and those are just the things which have actually made it into the news. Third, and last (for now), anyone who has had any experience with any government agency can attest to just how screwed up such a large bureaucracy can be, in dealing with even the simplest information.
I recently went round and round with the IRS over some forms which they thought I had to file. I didn’t, and established that to the satisfaction of the office which contacted me. Yet for six months I was still being contacted by another office in charge with collecting the necessary fees and fines – three times I had to send a copy of the letter from the initial office which cleared me of the matter, before they finally, and almost grudgingly, admitted that I owed them no money (for not filing the documents I didn’t need to file). These are not the same people I want to trust to handle even *more* information about me.
Allowing the government to take this position – that the default should be that they can just take whatever information about us they want, so long as they promise not to misuse it – is to abandon any illusions that we are in any way, shape, or form a free people. It would turn the entire equation of the Constitution on its head, saying that the government is sovereign and we its subjects. That such a thing is even proposed by a government employee is extremely revealing, and should cause no little amount of concern.
Jim Downey
(Via BoingBoing. Cross posted to UTI.)
Communion Of Dreams 