Communion Of Dreams


So, you think you’re hard?
April 9, 2012, 10:17 am
Filed under: Failure, MetaFilter | Tags: , , , , , ,

I’ve got a lot of respect for people who attempt difficult, almost impossible tasks. People who not only risk failure, but challenge it. Who step up to it in a bar, tap it on the shoulder, and then spit in its eye.

People like this:

In the fringe world of ultra endurance sports, there is an outlier: The Barkley.

The Barkley is the world’s toughest race you’ve never heard of. With 59,100 feet of climb and decent over 100 miles, it’s considered the most difficult endurance event on the planet. In its 25-year history, only twelve men, the same amount of men who have walked on the moon, have actually been able to finish the race.

* * *

The course is five loops around the park, totally unmarked, mostly off trail, with a time limit of sixty hours.

There are no manned aid stations. You must carry everything you need to survive “out there” including a map and compass (no GPS allowed) to navigate the course.

There are no rescues. You must self-extract, however long it takes, and get back to camp.

As I’ve said before:

The most interesting people I know are not the ones who have only succeeded in everything they’ve tried – that type is either too self-satisfied to be interesting, or so unambitious to have never pushed themselves. Give me people who go too far, who push themselves in what they do past their abilities, who are ambitious enough to want to Paint the Moon. Those are the people who are interesting.

Go take a look at that first site I mentioned above. There you’ll see before & after portraits of some of this year’s participants, along with how they fared in the attempt. If you think that you’re athletic, or can push yourself, consider what they accomplished. Then look in the mirror and think again.

I have no illusions. I was a fair athlete ‘back in the day’ but I was never in the kind of condition that these people are – even the ones who ‘only’ last 12 hours.

Maybe I only like these sorts of things because they make me feel better about my own failures.

I can live with that.

Jim Downey

Via MeFi.



Space . . . the final infographic.

Two items.

One: Yesterday’s post was the most popular thing I’ve written here in years. Actually, I think it might be the second-best ever. Go figure.

(Well, three. I should mention this other item.)

Two: Possibly related, though things were doing quite well even before yesterday’s post – so far this month we’ve sold almost 50 copies (mostly Kindle) of Communion of Dreams. Thanks, everyone!

(No, make that four. Damn, forgot about this one.)

Three: Got another review. And it serves as a nice counterpoint to all those who enjoyed the book.

(Finally.)

And lastly, which I intended to be my second point all along: this very cool site showing relative scale of our solar system. I’ve seen this attempted a number of times and different ways online, but this is the best I’ve come across yet:

OMG SPACE is the thesis project of Margot Trudell, an OCAD student studying graphic design in Toronto, Canada. This website aims to illustrate the scale and the grandeur of our solar system, as well as illustrate through the use of infographics our work in the exploration of our solar system with various spacecraft.

And now I need to turn my attention to some book conservation work I want to wrap up. Cheers!

Jim Downey



Turn! Turn! Turn!*

This is . . . difficult.

Difficult because it is hard to see myself this way. Difficult because it is largely taboo in our culture. Difficult because I’m still struggling with it. Difficult because reality sometimes comes as a shock.

Last year was a hard year for me, as I said earlier:

Because 2011, while it had some good things about it, was mostly just painful. Literally. In many regards, I’d just as soon forget the bulk of it.

But I hadn’t quite realized just how hard it was until confronted with some numbers yesterday. Those numbers were on our tax returns, collected from the accountant.

Yeah, like I said, taboo. You’re not supposed to talk about income in our culture, at least within certain limits. I won’t stray too far over the line, but I will say that there was a reason that I was feeling frustrated and angry last year about the response to my writing efforts. That reason amounted to having an income so low that after deductions, we owed *no* taxes to either the state or federal government in the final analysis. Well, we had to pay the ‘self-employment’ tax, but that’s it.

Do you know how little you have to make in order to not pay any income tax? Well, trust me, if you don’t, you don’t want to, at least not by direct experience.

It was due to a combination of things. The recession had squeezed my book conservation business all along, limiting the money people had for something so discretionary, but last year was the worst. And the pain from my intercostal tear was very limiting until very recently. And I sunk way too much time and energy into getting Her Final Year ready for publication and then trying to promote it. Yes, I accept my own culpability for this, and I am not trying to blame or shame anyone else.

Which is why it is difficult to talk about. But facing the hard, cold reality helps me to understand some things. About my self. About my motivations and behavior over the last year or so.

Obviously, I got through the last year OK, thanks to a variety of resources I had. Hell, I was able to travel to New Zealand (a commitment made when things were more flush). And I’m happy to say that so far this year things are looking up. My book conservation work has picked up. My intercostal tear is *slowly* getting better.

And I’m actually selling books. Not too many of Her Final Year yet, but a decent start with Communion of Dreams.

Thanks to all who have helped to change the dynamic. Seriously, just knowing that people find the books worthwhile – that they are willing to tell others about them, write reviews, et cetera, makes a huge difference. I very much appreciate it.

Jim Downey

*



Target practice.
April 2, 2012, 12:56 pm
Filed under: NASA, Science, Space | Tags: , , , , ,

Pretty cool little vid:

Just had to share that.

Jim Downey



Oh, no!

Some miscellaneous bits this morning…

Since the close of the Kindle edition promotion on Saturday, about two dozen people have actually purchased a copy of Communion of Dreams in one form or another. Yay! Keep it up, people!

Oh, no! – TV Tropes Warning – while doing some ego-surfing this morning (actually, I’m still trying to get a handle on what promotional efforts work, what don’t) I found that CoD is the first listing under the ‘Literature’ sub-heading of the TV Tropes entry on First Contact Team. I always get sucked into TV Tropes, because it is such a good tool for exploring modern literature in all its various and sundry forms, and it is cool to be included in it. Thanks to whomever added Communion of Dreams to the entry! (Any chance of getting a direct link to the CoD homepage?)

As you all know, I screwed up and wasn’t able to extend the promotion to yesterday. However, there’s another day coming soon which is also important in the novel: April 12. From the very first paragraph of the book:

He could see four or five thousand buffalo, one of the small herds. They stretched out in a long line below him, wide enough to fill the shallow valley along this side of the river, coming partway up the sides of the hill, not fifty meters from where he stood. The sky was its perpetual blue-grey, as clear as it ever got at this latitude, though the sun was almost bright. Late winter snow, churned into a dull brown mass by the buffalo where they trekked along the valley floor, nonetheless glinted along the tops of the hills. Weather forecasts said more snow was coming. It was Friday, April 12.

Hmm…let’s see if I can get my act together for that date. Stay tuned.

Lastly, there are some new reviews up on the Amazon page for Communion, and I’d invite you to check them out, rate them if you find them useful. As I said yesterday, reviews seem to really make a difference – if you’ve read the book, please consider writing your own review. Thanks!

Jim Downey



Happy Artifact Day!

So, as noted previously, forty years from today is the actual day which Darnell Sidwell finds the ‘artifact’ on Titan. I won’t say more in case of, well, spoilers.

Anyway, as I said, I had intended on having the Kindle promotion extend into today, but managed to screw that up. Since Amazon hasn’t gotten around to activating the additional promotion day, I’ll just have to pick a date here later this month to do so.

But that’s OK – yesterday’s promotion was actually quite good. It was slow going until one of the big “free ebook” sites posted about Communion of Dreams being free, and then things took off quite nicely. In the end, there were a total of 1,777 downloads of the book putting Communion at #1 in the “High Tech SF” category of the free Kindle store for much of the late evening. Yay!

And altogether, that means that there were 7,067 people who got the book in one form or another in all of March. Add in the 111 already in April (the difference between the accounting and scheduling branches of Amazon’s Kindle Direct Publishing – though there have been 4 actual sales of the book this morning already), plus the sales in the first six weeks of the book being available, and that puts us well over 8,000 total copies of the book distributed. As I’ve said previously:

And again I would like to thank everyone who has helped to make this a reality. And in particular I appreciate everyone who has taken the time to let me know they’ve enjoyed the book, or have gone and written a review on Amazon. That is both rewarding and very helpful.

And speaking of which, if you *have* read the book, please do take a few minutes to review it on Amazon. It seems to make a huge difference – I’ve seen several people comment elsewhere that they decided to take a chance on the book because of the reviews. Likewise, rate the other reviews, or ‘Like’ the book – that also seems to make a substantial difference.

Lastly, just a note – you can ‘Like’ the Facebook page and follow me on Twitter. Now that the book is somewhat unsteadily standing on its own feet I plan on cutting back on the promotional efforts on my regular Facebook account. I will keep posting info here, but mostly I intend to focus communication about upcoming events on those other outlets specific to the book.

Thanks again, one and all – and Happy Artifact Day!

Jim Downey



“Without gratuitous sex or violence”

One of the more enjoyable aspects of having Communion of Dreams out there is the consistently positive response it is generating. Reading reviews, seeing what others post about it in comments & blog posts, getting messages – all of these help affirm that the work which went into writing the book was worthwhile.

This morning I opened my CoD inbox to find a very nice message from someone who had just read the book. After favorably commenting on my book, and then relating some other books by VERY big-name authors he had read recently, he said this:

The [other author’s] novel mentioned was, I think, his best to date, and while it ended beautifully, there was a darkness behind it that left a tragic feeling when I was done. The other two are very, very grim indeed. I mention all of these because in the absence of the awe and sense of newness of the pioneers of science fiction, most authors take the route of being deliberately cynical–often bolster their flagging motivation with plenty of sex.

I am greatly impressed that you have created a suspenseful novel without gratuitous sex or violence, and paint a hopeful human picture in what could easily have been the run-of-the-mill depressing post-apocalyptic world.

I have to chuckle – it seems almost like a back-handed compliment, though I know it wasn’t intended that way. And in truth, he’s quite right. In fact, this is what I said in regards to that in my return note:

Thanks – both the core story and the decision to leave out the gratuitous sex & violence was very deliberate (as you know) because I wanted the book to be akin to the SF I enjoyed in my own youth. I wanted not just my contemporaries to enjoy the book, but for it to be enjoyable by their kids and grandkids. I agree that it is impossible at this point to recapture the innocent optimism of Clarke and others, but there’s nothing wrong with trying to again find optimism in understanding the limitations of the world – I think we’ve lost that in the last couple of decades.

Anyway – yeah, I’m guilty of being a cynical old bastard. But my book isn’t.

And on that note, a reminder that today is a promotional day: you can get the Kindle edition for free, all day. Help me get the word out, if you would be so kind.

Thanks!

Jim Downey



Sunday, foolish Sunday.

As noted, Sunday is the actual 40th ‘pre-anniversary’ of the discovery of the artifact on Titan. And as noted in that blog post, I had intended on having a free Kindle edition promotion all day to celebrate that, but had also decided to add in tomorrow just in case someone thought that the Sunday listing might be some kind of April Fool’s prank.

Well, it looks like the joke is on me. Or I’m the Fool. Take your pick.

See, because of some glitches in the Amazon scheduling system back on March 4 when last I did a promotion, Amazon decided to give me an additional promotion day (you get 5 such days during each quarter you’re signed up with KDP Select). That’s cool – so I intended to use it this weekend.

Except I screwed up and didn’t note that said additional promotion day needed to go through Amazon’s bureaucracy, rather than just being scheduled directly by yours truly. Oops.

So I have contacted said bureaucracy, and submitted said request. But whether they’ll get it in place by Sunday is an open question.

So let’s just assume that tomorrow may be the only day this weekend for you to get your free copy of the book, and plan accordingly. Should Amazon get the extra day in place, I’ll let people know. But for now, help to share news of Communion of Dreams being *FREE* all day tomorrow! And remember, you don’t even need to own a Kindle to get your copy: there is a Kindle emulator available for just about any computer/tablet/mobile device – ALSO for FREE!

This was my screw-up. And I’ll make it up with another free weekend sometime in the next quarter. But for now, spread the word that Communion of Dreams is going to be free all day tomorrow (and maybe Sunday!) We had over 5,000 downloads last time – and I keep hearing that people really love the book – so let’s make the world a little better for others who would enjoy it!

Thanks.

Jim Downey



Fear is the mind-killer.*

It’s time to wake up.

Bruce Schneier and Kip Hawley had a good debate recently in the pages of the Economist over the proposition: “This house believes that changes made to airport security since 9/11 have done more harm than good.”

Both of the primaries in the debate make their points about as solidly as they can be made, in my opinion, and the ensuing back & forth and discussion with other participants was . . . vigorous.

I wasn’t surprised at the result, though the moderator seems to have been. Here’s an excerpt from his final statement:

I thought Kip Hawley would have the tougher role as the opposer, but I have still been surprised at the vehemence and quantity of the views expressed in favour. The debate was American in emphasis, and the tetchiness of the relationship between many Americans and the TSA is perhaps something this Briton hadn’t fully appreciated. In Britain, where airports employ their own security, we lack the monolithic body on which to focus anger about liquids in hand luggage, shoe-removal and the like.

Voters have roundly declared that the frustrations, the delays, the loss of liberty and the increase in fear that characterise their interactions with airport-security procedures vastly outweigh the good these procedures achieve. For some, indeed, the benefits are essentially non-existent: any sensible terrorist can find a work-around or choose a different point of attack, as Bruce Schneier explains. And so the widely expressed hope is that changes made to security in the (near) future will make the whole regime less reactive, more rational, more flexible and more intelligence-driven. The results of this debate suggest that these changes should be made with some urgency: passengers are angry.

As I said, no surprise to me. That’s because the actual problem isn’t with security, it is with liberty. I think that this has been the main problem all along – the governmental response to the 9/11 attacks were understandable, predictable, and almost completely misguided. From Schneier’s closing statement:

The current TSA measures create an even greater harm: loss of liberty. Airports are effectively rights-free zones. Security officers have enormous power over you as a passenger. You have limited rights to refuse a search. Your possessions can be confiscated. You cannot make jokes, or wear clothing, that airport security does not approve of. You cannot travel anonymously. (Remember when we would mock Soviet-style “show me your papers” societies? That we’ve become inured to the very practice is a harm.) And if you’re on a certain secret list, you cannot fly, and you enter a Kafkaesque world where you cannot face your accuser, protest your innocence, clear your name, or even get confirmation from the government that someone, somewhere, has judged you guilty. These police powers would be illegal anywhere but in an airport, and we are all harmed—individually and collectively—by their existence.

And this is *exactly* what was desired by Osama bin Laden all along: to prompt us to react in fear, to incur huge expenses in trying to make ourselves ‘safe’, and to stress the very foundations of our society. Again, from Schneier:

Increased fear is the final harm, and its effects are both emotional and physical. By sowing mistrust, by stripping us of our privacy—and in many cases our dignity—by taking away our rights, by subjecting us to arbitrary and irrational rules, and by constantly reminding us that this is the only thing between us and death by the hands of terrorists, the TSA and its ilk are sowing fear. And by doing so, they are playing directly into the terrorists’ hands.

The goal of terrorism is not to crash planes, or even to kill people; the goal of terrorism is to cause terror. Liquid bombs, PETN, planes as missiles: these are all tactics designed to cause terror by killing innocents. But terrorists can only do so much. They cannot take away our freedoms. They cannot reduce our liberties. They cannot, by themselves, cause that much terror. It’s our reaction to terrorism that determines whether or not their actions are ultimately successful. That we allow governments to do these things to us—to effectively do the terrorists’ job for them—is the greatest harm of all.

Complete safety is an illusion. A fantasy. I know most people don’t want to actually think about that, but the truth is that living is a terminal disease and there’s more than a fair chance you will suffer your share of accidents along the way. Accept that, and you can go through your life trying to minimize those while maximizing your happiness. But if you are obsessed with never being at risk – if you let fear control you – then you will be controlled by others.

I’ve written a lot about terrorism (64 tags), and violence (82), and civil rights (102) over the years, going on and on about how our privacy and even our dignity have been eroded by unthinking fear. I guess I have long since passed the point of being a crank about this in general and the TSA in particular.

But this is important. Essential, I would say, for the life of our Republic. We’ve stumbled. Just as we have stumbled before in the face of a shocking attack. We’ve stumbled in blind panic. We’ve all been through a kind of societal Posttraumatic stress disorder. And the time has come to shake off the fear response, to once again engage the thinking parts of our brains. Only then can we hope to recover not just life, but also liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

Jim Downey

*Of course: “I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear… And when it is gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear is gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”



Perhaps this time.

For whatever reason, recently I’ve had an interest in pickled eggs.

* * * * * * *

Bits & pieces:

“It is late, and things are not getting better.”

“A gun don’t make you bulletproof.”

“Tribal groups who all have their chieftains.”

* * * * * * *

I’ve had false starts, and false hope, before. In some ways, “false hope” is something of a summary of my life.

Anyway, I’ve been doing a *lot* of thinking about the prequel to Communion of Dreams, titled St. Cybi’s Well. I think this is the fourth of fifth time that I’ve started writing it. Before I’ve gotten as far as a chapter or two, outlines for more of the book. Or sometimes just making notes.

This time? We’ll see. At least some people are asking about it after reading Communion. That helps.

* * * * * * *

Yeah, bits & pieces. But none of those . . . fragments . . . necessarily means what it might seem. As I work through a story, I get these summations, these insights into something a character might think or do. I’ve been thinking a lot about Darnell Sidwell, who is the main character of St. Cybi’s Well. That much I’ve known all along.

And thinking about Darnell is risky. Why? Because he and I are tied together in some ways. Well, more than just occupying too much space in my head, I mean. He’s not an alter-ego of mine or anything, but we are close enough in age and cultural experience that I can’t help but compare myself to him at times. And the comparisons don’t always make me particularly happy.

* * * * * * *

For whatever reason, recently I’ve had an interest in pickled eggs.

Not sure why. I don’t remember eating them as a kid or anything. Frankly, I don’t remember ever having eaten one, though I’m sure I must have.

Eggs. Vinegar. Sugar, salt, spices. I like the way the kitchen smells now.

Sometimes you have to experiment.

Jim Downey




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